Saturday, August 27, 2011

From Full Time Engineer to Full Time Mom

Yes we still have temper tantrems, I think all three of us had at least one today.

It's been over two months and some friends have been asking how the transition from full time Engineer to full time Mom is going.
I wish I could have waved a magic wand and transformed into a dreamy calm, collected, organized, clean, and insightful house wife. It seems dropping the high power job did nothing to make doing the laundry more inviting.

I'm over 30 and still have a lot of growing up to do.  Sometimes I still have trouble repressing my ANGER when Kaio gets super demanding or uncooperative.  I still have trouble keeping the house CLEAN and fitting all the TO-DO's into the the day.  I still have DOUBTS about my ability as a mom to provide everything my kids need to thrive.

But, in general, I think things have been going pretty great.  I can't explain how much I love playing with the kids all day.  Here, I'll show you:

























I love my super sweet kids.  They climb on me pushing for space on a thigh or shoulder, and shower me with tickles and nuzzles.  They share with me their art and creations - like it's not real until mommy sees it.  They call me 'Mama' and take my hand.

Put a little head on my shoulder and hug me so tight.

Little hands on my back or face are the best.

They stuff veggies in their mouths and smile back at me, "look I'm eating salad!"

I wouldn't trade this time with them for anything and feel so privileged to have the opportunity to focus on them completely.

2 comments:

  1. aw! this post made me smile so much! it really is The Most Important thing you can be doing right now, spending this time with your precious, beautiful children.

    i have felt so overwhelmed this summer trying to decide to either put z in daycare and return to work, or be home with her and struggle financially. i am constantly questioning my choices, but i guess the thing that i keep coming back to is this - i know i need to do meaningful work in order to be happy, and there is NOTHING right now that i can think of that would even come close to feeling as meaningful as being here with my child to witness and nurture and support her growth. so i am trying to just embrace it!

    it is such a hard choice for moms to make today though. i just came across a really interesting book exploring these issues that i think you would enjoy. its called 'maternal desires' i am forgetting the authors name, but she is a woman psychologist and it is nonfiction. check it out. :)

    love you! xoxo

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  2. It is such a hard choice for those of us that don't have rich hubby's!
    For what it's worth, my kids really miss their friends from daycare/preschool. I'm hoping to get some part time work so i can afford to send Nala to preschool a couple days.
    I'm gonna check out that book! Thanks amiga!

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